As coaches, we are a supporter of many people. The provider of a safe place for clients to become self-aware, discover solutions, and celebrate their success. But who supports you?
As an ADHD Life Coach, one of the questions I teach my students to ask their clients and themselves is, “what support do you need?”
It often doesn’t occur to those with ADHD to consider who or what we need to help us achieve what we want. Sometimes this is because we have isolated ourselves from others due to our ADHD. The guilt and shame of our shortfalls have us going it alone. Or, it may not even occur to us that support makes it easier to accomplish a goal. Either way, not anticipating support is often why plans, objectives, and actions stop dead in their tracks.
As coaches, we are a natural support for our clients. Asking questions to help them clarify their underlying challenges and experimenting with steps, systems, and structures so they can reach their goals. Emphasizing personal ownership, self-responsibility, and accountability so they can experience long-term change. Support is an essential part of the coaching process. And it’s not always easy.
It’s humbling when clients accept our support and expertise in the coaching process. But, remember being a coach is a partnership. One human being to another, vulnerable, imperfect, and benefiting from support.
If we allow it, one of the great things about being a coach is how useful the coaching process is when applied to our own lives. In this case, support.
When we allow, acknowledge, and are grateful for the support in our own lives, we stay in integrity as a coach. We are authentic. Support, an essential tool in the coaching process, helps our clients and ourselves build a thriving life that we love.
So who supports you? Who has your back? Who provides that nonjudgmental, safe space where you express your vulnerabilities? Who cares enough to follow up, holds you as creative resource and whole, and celebrates with you when you succeed?
If we are lucky, behind us is at least one person, one trusted supporter. This may be the friend who trades off carpooling so we can schedule an afternoon of appointments with our clients. A spouse or partner who brings you a warm cup of tea, knowing you are immersed in writing your next blog. Or the neighbor who asks if you need anything at the market because they are heading there anyway.
While we would be thankful for any of those gestures, remember that support can come in ways we might not have considered. For instance, our supporters may be those who help us do what we’re best at. Who respect our passion for pursuing our dreams. Whose brilliance and gifts help yours to shine. In other cases, support may come intermittently. Someone who’s there for only a short time during a life challenge. Offering us strength and boosting our spirit at a critical moment. Support is a valuable part of living and succeeding. It is all around whether we notice it or not.
Support may come from the people we allow ourselves to hire. Nannies, assistants, gardeners, healers, therapists, and advisors.
Support may come from a mentor who shares their experience and leaves us feeling stronger, wiser, and more capable.
Support can be the person we allow to use their talents and skills in our lives. Our hairstylist, manicurist, yoga instructor, or person packing your groceries in the bag.
Support may be the person sitting next to you at a networking meeting who lets us borrow a pen.
Or someone from our past, like a teacher whose words still resonate in our minds.
Nature, animals, and pets are especially good at support. A gentle breeze or a beautiful sunset can distract us from our worries. A pet’s warm body lets us know we are not alone.
Support is all around for our clients and us. None of us can make it through life without it, and being aware of it allows us to accept its gift.
So, take some time today to acknowledge how support shows up in your life. Then, just as in your role as a coach, invite your clients to explore support in their lives.